being positive

Being positive isn't necessarily something I'm good at. My grandma, bless her heart, was the most optimistic soul I ever met - she saw the bright side of everything and never really let anything get her down. I'm sure that living through two world wars taught her to hide her feelings, and it didn't 'do' to express defeatism or pessimism because it was bad for morale.

I don't consider myself a particularly negative or pessimistic person - more a realist. I hate to build my hopes up to have them dashed, but conversely if the potential for very bad news exists I prefer to believe that all will be well in the end. I guess that isn't exactly realistic either My mother always said I was a bit of an ostrich and she was right.

Being positive in 2007, for me, means being content with my life. We are neither rich nor poor, we don't live paycheck to paycheck and if disaster were to befall us we have a bit of a cushion to protect us for a little while. Thanks to my very clever husband, that is. Having a comfortable life gives one a lot more time to consider those things which make us feel less than content. It's easy to criticise other people for the things they do and the way they behave, but one only has to remember that everyone has problems and difficulties to realise that their behaviour is a reaction to the things that happen in their lives. It's far easier to go through life imagining that the face that people show to the world is all there is, but the reality is that people are like icebergs. We only see the tip but there is a whole lot more hidden below the surface.

I find it frustrating to be with people who share little about themselves. I have always been a keen conversationalist but I am frustrated by people who constantly ask about me rather than share their own experiences. I don't ask too many questions because I don't want to pry into private business, but will happily answer any that are asked of me.... occasionally I leave someone with a cheery goodbye and then wish I hadn't said as much as I did.

I have a lot of insecurities about myself and the face I present to the world. Some days I can't say a right thing and others I find myself to be keenly insightful - and not only when I've been drinking either!

So, back to being positive.