When did I go out of fashion?

Somewhere between getting married at thirty-five and my eventual emergence out of nappy-changing and pre-school runs I lost my sense of style. When I started rediscovering myself after the children were all at school and I was looking to move out of the sweats and jeans, I found myself drawn back to the fashions that I had been wearing in the early 90s - except that by that time the rest of the world was in the mid- 2000's. Even then I didn't recognise that there was a problem because I naturally steered clear of the obvious teenager clothes, but being by that time a 'plus-size' lady I was definitely looking at more matronly styles, although I didn't realise it.

I've been in America for sixteen years now and I can tell you that there is a big difference between American and British fashions. At first, when I thought I was doing all right with my clothing choices I favoured Alfred Dunner. The styles fit me, the colours suited me. But why could I only find a few places to sell them? Then a couple of years ago it hit me - those fashions are made for the more 'mature' woman and of course, I wasn't ready to be relegated to those ranks. But wait - is the 'mature' woman old enough to be my mother or young enough to be my friend? Or either? Or both?

My dilemma continues. I am not, nor ever have been a fashionista - fashionable styles have usually been too 'skinny' for me, but without having to try too hard on the occasions when I've wanted to dress up I've usually been able to find something to wear that hasn't made me look frumpy. If I'm honest, the only places I look for clothes are Target and Walmart because both stores are within a couple of miles of home, and because my budget and fluctuating weight will not allow me to buy anything more expensive or of better quality. That, coupled with the 'plus size' limitations means that the clothes I wear have become very boring. What's a fifty-something to do in this situation? I have two sets of contemporaries to look to for fashion guidance: those who have children the same ages as mine, and my friends who range between ten years younger and ten years older than me. But do I like their clothes? Would their styles suit me? Do they even wear fashionable clothes? What's in fashion anyway?

Yesterday I did a big clean-out of my closet and removed all clothes which were:
* too big (yea!)
* too old
* too shabby
* too ugly
It didn't leave me with too many clothes, actually, but it did prove a point. I had one sweater that I've worn faithfully for seventeen years which I didn't notice had become faded and a little frayed. It must have been of superior quality to what I've been buying in recent years though. However, now I need to shop again and I am uninspired.

I've spent the past few years wearing nothing but trousers, and the past two or three years wearing mostly black. A typical outfit for me consists of black trousers, a Black T shirt or turtle-neck sweater with something of colour over the top, or a coloured T shirt or sweater with something black over the top. Never more than one colour and always two items in black, or occasionally another neutral. All this with sensible shoes, of course. I admit I'm now getting tired of this look and I am looking for a change, which is where I came in at the top of this page. I've lost my sense of fashion.

I can't and won't compete with my teenage daughter (heck I don't even understand the names of the garments she wears and I certainly wouldn't be seen attempting to wear them), I can't afford to buy anything but sale items from J. Jill, Coldwater Creek, Talbot or Chico (which doesn't even do plus sizes, no no idea why I even mention it). Even when I look there, I can't seem to find much to excite me to make me wish to add it to my wardrobe.

I am getting older, no doubt, but I'm not dead or retired yet. I have a young family and I want to be active and up to date for as long as I can. Reducing my size from Plus to Normal will certainly help - perhaps that alone will open up some fashion possibilities for me, but until then, it's flappy trousers and tops until I can find something new and refreshing to invest in.