What the heck?

OK so here's the dealio. As of two weeks from tomorrow I shall be jobless. However, I also feel useless and without purpose or function. Despite the time it took up and the toll it took on my emotions, I really miss doing my family history research.

I am completely conforming to the stereotype of the depressed post-menopausal woman. Here is a checklist:

• unpredictable moods
• emotions close to the surface
• feelings of worthlessness
• an inability to envisage a future
• a loss of interest in things
  

I am sure I have more but I can't be bothered.

What I need is a new interest. In the past few years have found things to inspire and fascinate me to become absorbed in, but none of them are in the running now, so what is it to be?

We have just booked up a Florida vacation for a week in the depths of winter but I cannot raise any enthusiasm for it. I am very fat and very tired. I want to have fun but I am not sure I can do that any more.

What a crabby old bitch I have become.